UMary Allen
I-Gender clichés ikhona nasembusweni wezilwane. Isibonelo esihle kakhulu: umbuzo mayelana nenja. Ngoba, ngokombono, abesilisa kuphela abakwenzayo ngempela. Ingabe kufanele ukhathazeke uma owesifazane wakho ephakamisa umlenze wakhe ukuze achame?
Lapho abesilisa bechama, baphakamisa imilenze yabo - ngisho nabantu abaningi abangenayo inja bayakwazi lokhu. Abesifazane bavame ukusquat. Okungenani lokho kuwukuchema. Ngoba abanye abanikazi babuye babone ukuthi insikazi yabo iphakamisa umlenze wayo ukuze ichame, futhi iduna liyagoba. Kungani?
Okokuqala, kuyathakazelisa ukwazi ukuthi kungani izinja zisquate noma ziphakamise imilenze yazo lapho zikhipha isinye. Eqinisweni, i-squatting ihlehlela emuva lapho iseyimidlwane - izinja eziningi ziqhuba ibhizinisi lazo emasontweni ambalwa okuqala, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubulili buni.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuphakamisa imilenze yakho kuvame ukuhlotshaniswa nephunga. Uma izinja zimaka indawo yazo, noma zimaka umchamo wokucindezeleka noma ukuheha ukunaka, ukuphakamisa umlenze kuyisinqumo esingcono kakhulu. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi ingakwazi ukuqondisa ukugeleza komchamo entweni eqondile, njengodonga lwendlu noma ucingo. Umchamo ungakhipha lapha, okusho indawo enkulu kunazo zonke futhi, ngakho-ke, iphunga elikhulayo.
Izinja Zichama Ngendlela Ezifuna Ngayo
Ngenxa yokuthi abesilisa bamaka indawo yabo ikakhulukazi, ukuphakamisa imilenze nakho kungahle kuhlotshaniswe nabo. Nokho, amanye amaduna ayaqhubeka nokuququda ukuze achame, ngisho nangemva kokuba engeyona imidlwane. Ngokufanayo, ezinye zezinsikazi ziqala ukuphakamisa imilenze yazo.
Ngokuvamile abesifazane bayinhlanganisela yokuququda kanye nokuphakamisa kancane umlenze wangemuva. Ukuthi insikazi iphakamisa umlenze wayo wangemuva ukuze ichame nakho kungahlotshaniswa nosayizi wayo. UDkt. Betty McGuire ucwaninga ukulebula iphunga ezinjeni. Uthole ukuthi abesifazane abancane banamathuba amaningi okuthi baphakamise imilenze yangemuva kunezinsikazi eziphakathi nendawo noma ezinkulu.
Kungaba yini isizathu? "Imiphumela yethu yangaphambilini ekuziphatheni komchamo kanye nobukhulu bomzimba isiholela ekuphetheni ngokuthi izinja ezincane zikhetha ukuxhumana zisebenzisa amalebula omchamo, okuvumela ukuthi zixhumane ngaphandle kokuxhumana okuqondile komphakathi," uphetha ocwaningweni lwakhe.
Ingabe Kubi Uma Owesifazane Wami Ephakamisa Umlenze Wayo Ukuze Achame?
Uma inja yakho ihlale ichama iphakamise umlenze wayo, akudingeki ukhathazeke ngokuthi kukhona okungahambi kahle ngayo. Kubukeka kuhlukile uma evele eshintsha ukuma kwakhe kokuchama. Ngendlela, okufanayo kusebenza kwabesilisa. Uma isilwane sichama ngendlela ehlukile kunejwayelekile, kungabonisa ubuhlungu noma ezinye izinkinga zempilo.
Ingabe inja yakho iyakhala, ichama kakhulu noma ngaphansi kunokuvamile, noma inendle ebuhlungu? Khona-ke kufanele ihlolwe ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka, weluleka udokotela wezilwane, uDkt. Jamie Richardson.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, ezinye izinja azikwazi ukukhomba kahle lapho ziphakamisa imilenze yazo yangemuva ukuze zichame. Kwesinye isikhathi umchamo ungena eboyeni bawo. Ukuze uvimbele lokhu ekubangeleni ukucasuka kwesikhumba, kufanele ugeze inja yakho, isibonelo, ngendwangu yesitsha noma ithawula elincane elifakwe amanzi afudumele.