UMary Allen
Ingabe inja yakho ikhonkotha lapho iyodwa?
Ngiyayazi le nkinga.
Futhi nakuba kuphula inhliziyo yami ukushiya isithandwa sami sodwa, ngezinye izikhathi ayikho enye indlela. Uma kufanele ngiye kudokotela, emsebenzini noma ngiyothenga, inja yami kufanele ihlale ekhaya.
Kwadingeka kutholakale ikhambi ukuze umngane wami onemilenze emine angaphazamisi indawo yonke ngokukhonkotha kwakhe njalo.
Kulesi sihloko ngizokukhombisa ukuthi ungayiqeqesha kanjani inja ukuba ibe yodwa ngenkathi ikwazi ukuphumula.
Inja ikhonkotha lapho iyodwa - lezi yizimbangela ezingenzeka
Ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana
Imbangela evamile yokukhonkotha kwenja yakho lapho iyodwa ukukhathazeka ngokwehlukana. Inja yakho ikuthanda kakhulu kangangokuthi ayifuni ukuhlukaniswa nawe. Ezinye izinja ziba nokukhathazeka okuqondile lapho zesaba ukushiywa.
Kodwa kungani inja ikhonkotha? Lokhu kuziphatha kubuyela emuva ebuntwaneni bokuqala benja. Lapho inja engumama isuka kumdlwane, umdlwane uyakhonkotha ukuze udonse ukunaka ukuze ungakhohlwa. Ngakho-ke ukukhonkotha kuyindlela yokuzivikela yemvelo ukuze uzidonsele amehlo. Izinja ziphinde zidlulisele lokhu kubantu ezibathandayo futhi zizame ukubashayela futhi.
Ukukhokha
Kodwa inja yakho ayihlali ihlushwa ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa lapho ikukhonkotha. Kwezinye izinja, kuyisicefe nje. Uma isithandwa sakho kufanele sibe sodwa, asinamuntu ongadlala naye, ozofuya, noma ongasibuka, kungaba yisicefe kakhulu. Ikakhulukazi izinja ezingawuvivinyi ngokwanele umzimba kanye nokusebenza kwengqondo ngokuvamile zikhonkotha ngenxa yesithukuthezi.
Lapho uhamba nenja, isithukuthezi sibuye sibe isici uma inja yakho ikhonkotha ezinye izinja. Lokhu kungaqalwa ngokusebenzisa umzila ofanayo njalo. Ezinye izinja zifuna ukwenza okuthile, njengokulanda induku noma ukunikeza imiyalo. Kungenjalo, bayazixaka futhi bakhonkothe ezinye izinja.
Ngazi kanjani ukuthi yini ebangela ukukhonkotha?
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi imbangela yamagxolo ubuhlungu bokuhlukana noma isithukuthezi, iphuzu elibalulekile liyinto efanayo. Kodwa akugcini lapho. Ukuze ukwazi ukubhekana nenkinga, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuhlaziya kahle ukuthi yini ebangela ukukhonkotha kusengaphambili. Kuye ngesimo, kufanele kuthathwe izindlela ezihluke ngokuphelele.
Ukuhlaziya okungalungile kungadala nezinkinga ezintsha ngoba cabanga ukuthi uqinile kakhulu nenja ehlushwa ukwesaba okukhulu kokulahlekelwa futhi "ujezise" ukuziphatha. Okungase kusize ngokukhonkotha okubangelwa isithukuthezi kungaqhubeka nokuyicasula inja ekhathazekile futhi kuthuntubeze kakhulu ukuzethemba.
Ngakho-ke ubona kanjani ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana nesithukuthezi?
Ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana kuvame ukubonakala ngaphambi kokuba uphume ngempela endlini. Izinja ezithintekile zinothando kakhulu futhi zizokulandela noma ngabe uya kuphi. Uma uya kwelinye igumbi, inja yakho - kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yenzani - izokulandela ukuze ingakukhohlwa.
Uma uzama ukumisa lokhu kuziphatha, isibonelo ngokutshela inja yakho ukuthi ihlale ekamelweni elithile noma endaweni ethile, abangani abanemilenze emine bavame ukungahlaliseki. Abanye baqala ukukhonkotha ezimeni ezinjalo aze akubuyisele emehlweni.
Lapho nje usufuna ukuphuma endlini, isithandwa sakho siba nokungaphumuli nakakhulu futhi sifuna ukuthathwa nawe ngazo zonke izindleko. Inja yakho ingaphansi kwengcindezi enkulu kulesi simo.
Lapho uphuma endlini, lokhu kushiwo kuqala ngokukhonkotha okukhulu. Uma lokho kungabuyisi i-biped back, izinja zisabela ngendlela ehlukile. Abanye bagcina behlise umoya kodwa bethuka kakhulu abazi ukuthi bazobhekana kanjani nestress sabo. Uhudo, ukungakuthandi ukudla, ukushaya kwenhliziyo okwandisiwe kanye nokunwebeka kwabafundi kuyizimpawu ezivamile zokukhathazeka ngokwehlukana.
Okunye okweqisayo kuvame ukuvezwa ngokucekela phansi okunamandla. Ngalokhu, abangani abanemilenze emine bazama ukunciphisa ukwesaba nokucindezeleka kwabo. Umphumela uba ama-cushions adabukile, iminyango eklwetshiwe kanye nefenisha ewile.
Inkinga kulesi simo wukuthi nezinja ezibhokile zivame ukucekela phansi izinto. Ngakho-ke kuneziqephu ezifanayo, kodwa zavela ngezisusa ezihluke ngokuphelele. Izinja ezazinesithukuthezi zivame ukudlala kakhulu futhi zinomoya ophezulu ngisho nalapho kukhona umnikazi wazo. Futhi banezinkinga ezimbalwa uma ushintsha amagumbi isikhashana.
Ekugcineni, uyazi inja yakho kangcono futhi ungahlola ukuthi kungenxa yokukhathazeka ngokuhlukana noma isithukuthezi.
Kodwa-ke, uma ungaqiniseki, kufanele ufune iseluleko kuchwepheshe. Ngoba uma ukuziphatha kuhlaziywa ngokungalungile, kunengozi yokuthi uma uzama ukuxazulula inkinga, uzokwenza konke kube kubi nakakhulu futhi wenze inja yakho ukungabi nabulungisa. Futhi-ke, akekho ofuna lokho.
Inja ikhonkotha lapho iyodwa – lena yindlela oyixazulula ngayo inkinga
Njengoba sekushiwo, ngaphambi kokuthi uxazulule inkinga, kufanele uqale uhlaziye kahle ukuthi kungani lokhu kuziphatha kwenzeka. Bese ungazama izixazululo ezenziwe ngezifiso.
Hlala njalo unake inja yakho, izokukhombisa ukuthi yini eyisizayo nokuthi isilungele yini isinyathelo esilandelayo. Ukuqeqeshwa kwenja kuhlale kungumuntu ngamunye, ikakhulukazi uma kuziwa ekuxazululeni izinkinga zokuziphatha.
Vimbela isithukuthezi
Ingabe inja yakho inesithukuthezi lapho iyodwa? Le nkinga kulula ukuyixazulula. Qiniseka ukuthi inja yakho ijima ngokwanele. Ngokufanelekile, uzomsebenzela izikhathi ezimbalwa zokuqala lapho uphuma endlini ukuze inja yakho ijabulele ukulala kahle ebusuku.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukudla, amanzi kanye namathoyizi ezinja kufanele kube khona ukuze inja yakho ikwazi ukuzigcina imatasa. Ngekhamera yenja ungakwazi ukuqapha isithandwa sakho futhi uhlole ukuthi wenzani lapho eyedwa. Amanye amakhamera wezinja nawo anomsebenzi wokunikeza izibiliboco.
Uma inja yakho inesithukuthezi futhi ikhonkotha, ungakubona lokhu kukhamera futhi uyinikeze ubumnandi ukuze ithulise ngohlelo lokusebenza.
Kusenesikhathi, ungazijwayeza nenja yakho ukuthi ungazigcina kanjani imatasa ngokungadlali nenja ngaso sonke isikhathi, kodwa ngezinye izikhathi umane uyijikijele ithoyizi bese ungayinaki inja lapho ikucela ukuthi udlale. Izinja zifunda ngokushesha ukuthi zingazijabulisa zodwa futhi azimdingi umuntu njalo.
Ukuze uvimbele ukukhonkotha, kufanele uyeke ngokushesha ukukhonkotha ukhona. Izinja eziningi, ezicikeka kalula, zivame ukukhonkotha abanikazi bazo ukuze zizikhuthaze ukuthi zidlale. Uma umngane onemilenze emibili bese edlala, inja ifunda ngokungalungile ukuthi ukukhonkotha kuhle.
Ukwengeza, uma inja yakho ikhonkotha lapho iyodwa futhi izwa imisindo, ukuyethula ezinhlobonhlobo zemisindo ehlukene kungasiza. Njengoba ukuqeqeshwa kuqhubeka, ungakwazi futhi ukuzijwayeza ukujika phambi komnyango wangaphambili, uphonsa ukhiye futhi wenze eminye imisindo.
Isithukuthezi singaba nomthelela omubi ezinjeni ezingaphandle kwekhaya. Ingabe inja yakho ayifuni ukuhamba? Uma ubona ukuthi umngane wakho onemilenze emine akafuni ukuza noma ugijima ngokungenanjongo, kufanele ushintshe okuthile ngokushesha.
Letha okuhlukahlukene ekuhambeni kwakho futhi uchithe isikhathi nenja yakho ngezikhathi ezithile. Inselele ngezinduku zokulanda noma umfundise imiyalo emisha. Inja yakho izokubonga.
Vimbela ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana
Uma inja yakho ihlushwa ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa, kufanele uqhubeke ngokucophelela.
Ukujezisa akusizi ngalutho kule nkinga futhi kungandisa ngisho novalo. Abanye abantu batusa ukuziba inkinga. Kodwa lokho akusizi futhi kungenza inkinga ibe nzima nakakhulu.
Cabanga nje ukuthi uyesaba kakhulu okuthile futhi othile angakunaki noma akujezise ngakho - akuwona umbono omuhle, akunjalo? Iqiniso liwukuthi ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana kungaxazululwa kuphela ngokuqeqeshwa okufanele kanye nesikhathi esiningi.
Isinyathelo sokuqala: Dala indawo yokuzizwa kamnandi
Isinqandamathe sakho kumele sifunde ukuthi kukhona indawo ekhaya lapho singakhululeka khona. Angahlehla lapho uma kukhona okumehlulayo. Lapho ngeke aphazamiseke. Le ndawo ingaba, isibonelo, ingubo yokulala noma ibhokisi lenja.
Ukuze inja yakho ihlobanise indawo yokuzizwa kahle nento enhle, kwanele ukuthi iningi labangane abanemilenze emine basabalalise ukuphatha okumbalwa. Amathambo okuhlafuna inja yakho echitha isikhathi eside nawo afanelekile. Ngakho umatasa futhi ufunda ukuthanda indawo yokuzizwa ejabule.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, ama-hormone enjabulo akhululwa lapho ukuhlafuna, abese exhunyaniswa nendawo. Lapho ukhetha indawo efanelekile, kufanele uphendule izintandokazi zenja yakho. Abangane abanemilenze emine bavame ukuba nendawo eyintandokazi endlini ngokwabo, lapho bevame ukuhlala khona. Ngakho-ke kungani ungamisi indawo yokuzizwa ujabule khona lapho?
Isinyathelo sesi-2: Fundisa inja ukuphumula
Lapho indawo yokuzizwa kahle isisunguliwe, yisikhathi sokufundisa othandekayo wakho ukuthi aphumule. Amafutha abalulekile afana ne-lavender angasiza. Inja yakho kufanele ifunde ukuvala umyalo futhi ihlale endaweni yayo yokunethezeka ngaphandle kokukulandela njalo. Ukuze inja yakho ingakhungatheki, kufanele ukhuphule kancane kancane ibanga lakho ukusuka kuyo.
Kungase kubukeke kanje: Uthumela umngane wakho onemilenze emine endaweni yakhe yenhlalakahle futhi umnikeze umyalo wokuba akhululeke. Ithambo elihlafunwayo lisiza njengesiphazamiso.
Bese usuka kancane, linda isikhashana, futhi uma inja yakho ihlala ikhululekile, yibuyisele futhi uyidumise. Ngokuzayo uma uhamba kancane, okokuqala nje isikhathi esifushane, kamuva eside futhi eside. Okubalulekile ukuthi inja yakho kufanele iqaphele ukuthi ulokhu ubuya.
Isinyathelo sesi-3: Lapho uphuma endlini, ungavumeli noma yiziphi iziyaluyalu zivuke
Abanikazi bezinja abaningi bavalelisa izinja zabo kakhulu lapho behamba futhi behlela ukubuya kwabo. Nokho, lokhu kubonisa umngane onemilenze emine ukuthi kukhona okukhethekile okuzayo futhi yilokho kanye okufanele ukugweme nezinja ezinokukhathazeka ngokuhlukana.
Uma ukwazi ukusuka endaweni yokunethezeka yenja isikhathi eside futhi inja yakho ihlala ikhululekile, sekuyisikhathi sokuphuma endlini. Konke kufanele kube njengokujwayelekile ngangokunokwenzeka. Imizila igcina inja yakho iphephile.
Kungcono ukuqhubeka njengasesinyathelweni sesi-2 bese uvele uphume ngomnyango ongaphambili imizuzwana embalwa ngaphandle kokuvalelisa. Uma konke kuhlala kuzolile, buyela ngaphakathi futhi udumise inja yakho. Lokhu-ke kuyanda ngokuqhubekayo kuze kube yilapho usukwazi ukuphuma ngaphandle kwendlu nganoma yisiphi ubude besikhathi.
Uma eqala ukukhonkotha futhi, thatha isinyathelo emuva ekuqeqesheni kwakho futhi usebenzele ukuphumula. Uma ubuya, konke kufanele kube ngokwejwayelekile. Uma inja yakho ijabulile bese igxuma futhi ijabulela ukukubona futhi, kufanele uzibe lokhu kuziphatha.
Kuphela lapho ukuphumula kubuya lapho kukhona ukudunyiswa okukhulu. Ngiyazi ukuthi kunzima ngezinye izikhathi, kodwa ukuphikelela kuyazuzisa.
Isiphetho
Uma inja yakho ikhonkotha lapho iyodwa, ingabangelwa isithukuthezi noma ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana.
Kowokuqala, ukufundisa inja ukuzilibazisa futhi indiva ukukhonkotha ngokuphelele njengendlela yokudlala kuzosiza.
Ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana, ngakolunye uhlangothi, kudinga ukuzwela okukhulu. Thatha isikhathi sakho futhi uzijwayeze ukuphumula nenja yakho, ngisho nalapho usungasekho emgqeni wayo. Akufanele neze ujezise abangani abakhathazekile abanemilenze emine, njengoba lokhu kuzokwenza izinkinga zibe zimbi nakakhulu.
Kwesinye isikhathi awukwazi ukuhamba wedwa. Ngokwesibonelo, umngane wami unenkinga yokuthi inja yakhe endala ikhonkotha lapho eyedwa. Lokhu kunzima kakhulu ngoba lokhu kuziphatha sekuneminyaka kuzenzakalela.
Ezimweni ezinjalo, kungase kube usizo ukufuna usizo lochwepheshe. Lokhu konga isikhathi nezinzwa.
Esimeni esinjalo, ngincoma isifundo se-inthanethi sokukhonkotha sikaMartin Rütter & Conny Sporrer. Isifundo esiku-inthanethi singakusiza ukuthi uqonde ukuziphatha kwesithandwa sakho sokukhonkotha futhi uqeqeshe ngempumelelo ukukhonkotha. Ukuze ekugcineni ukwazi ukuqhubeka nokuphila kwakho kwansuku zonke ngaphandle kokukhonkotha.